Often times when we get angry, some of us bottle it up inside, some of us lash out at others around us whether verbally or physically, some of us clock out from the situation, and some of us channel it into something specific. They are many ways that people can deal with anger yet most of us react rather than respond. When a person reacts, it’s instant.
Reacting means there is not much thinking or conscious processing involved, it’s just reacting, whether it’s arguing or fighting as a survival or defense mechanism. On the other hand, when a person responds, they do more thinking and are more considerate of others as well as consequences and will therefore take more time to respond even in times of heated situations.
It’s very important to understand that anger is a healthy emotion and all emotions are valid. Often times, anger acts like a defensive emotion that serves as a driving force for the individual to help push him or her forward. However, there are times when that anger is no longer serving the person in a positive way and instead creates rifts in relationships and hinders the person from thinking clearly. So in times that the anger is overwhelming, here are 5 of the best ways to control yourself in responding rather than reacting to anger.
1. Adult Timeout
To prevent yourself from simply reacting in a heated situation, put yourself on timeout. It may sound silly or even childish, but timeout is not only for kids, adults can use it too in order to give yourself time to settle down and refocus your thoughts more clearly before expressing yourself. If someone or something triggers anger within you, simply walk away for a bit until you have had the time to analyze the situation more clearly and find ways to talk about the situation in a calmer manner. Doing this will teach you to respond rather than react.
2. Physical Activity or Exercise
Since anger is one of those strong emotions that makes you want to move and do something about it, engaging in any rigorous physical activity like boxing or tennis or swimming, etc. can really help to alleviate the energy created of inside the body from the anger. Though this may not take care of the cause of it, it’s a way for you to channel the anger through your body, releasing built up tension to feel much more at ease afterwards. The added benefit to this is you got a good workout and it promotes a healthier, fit body.
3. Relaxation Skills
In hypnosis, we teach you some relaxation skills to use to help manage anger and stress. However, simply deep breathing can help to release some of the bottled up emotions. Taking 3 long deep breaths moves the energy and the blood through your body, therefore releasing some of that anger. Also, having your own key phrase or your own mantra to help you calm down can make a huge difference between reacting versus responding. Some examples of these are “Just Breathe” or “Tranquilo” or the famous “Woosaahh” from the movie Bad Boys.
4. Healthy Expression
Having a friend or trusted companion that you can vent to is a great way to express your inner feelings. Other ways of healthy expression can be through any form of art or writing. This way your feelings can be expressed and it doesn’t continue staying inside of you and brew till you explode or lash out at the people around you or your loved ones.
5. Hypnotherapy for Anger
For someone that is angry all the time, or that gets triggered into anger by the simplest of things, hypnotherapy for anger is the best method to help. With hypnotherapy, we not only help you go deeper into the anger but also help you to eliminate it by transforming the inner source of it. There are many times we have found that even though someone comes in wanting hypnotherapy for anger, the anger is like an umbrella for other inner emotions that have been welling up inside the individual. Knowing this, it’s easy to help the client change their perspective as they become aware of what they are truly feeling inside rather than just the cover up feeling of anger.
No matter what’s triggering the anger inside the individual, it’s normally not something from the present but something from the past that is consistently playing out in the subconscious mind which inadvertently causes the person to react with anger to the external triggers. Using hypnotherapy for anger is definitely the best method to deal with anger as over a short period of time, you’ll find yourself feeling more at peace, more in control, and more free to enjoy being in the present.